Give yourself a little credit

I don't think most of us give ourselves enough credit for what we know or what we do. I guess narcissistic people do, but the majority of us don't. Here we are at the end of November, getting ready to end the year, and a pretty hard one at that. Many of us had a couple of hard years, facing job losses or cutbacks, and new stress brought on by the economic downturn. Well, we end the year in recovery or at least heading in that direction. We faced hardships, we cut back, we cleaned up, we managed the unknown, and we lived to see another day.

I hope we learned a few things this year about fear, survival, and living within our means. I certainly heard over and over again that employees could not live on less than they were making before the recession hit. That turned out to be untrue for most, maybe all. We all managed to survive the blast, maybe with less material goods, savings, and retirement funds. We may have substituted the cash and credit for more meaningful things, like time, patience, and understanding. Most of us kept the important things, like our relationships and good health, and cleaned out the negative influences. Perhaps the nasty recession was necessary in some way, to get our priorities straight and put our egos in check. Now is the time to reflect on what we’ve learned through all the hardship. How did we manage through the pain and come out alive?

We have choices again and we need to decide what we can draw on that is our own to offer the working world, the volunteer arena, and most importantly, our family unit. What great changes did we make during the past couple of years that we can continue to build on? We have all been given some gifts, talents, and abilities, and when things are easy we tend to tuck them away. But when things get tough, we draw on them to help us overcome adversity. Now that you remember your strengths, don't let them go. Draw on them more often, whatever they may be, and use them to propel you forward.

I believe our Christmas gift to ourselves should be a gratitude note about the lessons we learned this year and a commitment to apply these lessons and move forward in some way. This will be the best gift we can give ourselves and others as well, because when we are okay with ourselves and put our best foot forward, we have immense power and influence over others. As long as we stay positive, we can assist those who may still need the push to make positive choices and changes in their lives. And don’t forget to give yourself a pat on the back; we deserve a little credit for all that we’ve accomplished this year.

Do you need more hours in a day?

Did daylight savings save you, because it gave you one more hour in a day? When was the last time you asked someone how they were doing and they did not say busy? These days, it seems as though we are all too busy and we never really have the time to relax, without our to-do lists looming over our heads.

My friend Anne says we are all trying to squeeze every two minutes into one minute nowadays which is why we feel as though we cannot possibly accomplish everything we set out to do in a day. Logic does prevail and eventually we all come to some type of conclusion regarding how much time we really have in a day, 24 hours, except for daylight savings days. But, it sure would be nice to have more time do the things we want to do.

Some people think they will manage to keep their jobs even if they are always behind, while others think they cannot leave work until they are completely finished and their desks are cleaned off. There should be some middle ground, I say. If we really want to do something drastic about our time and what we squeeze into it, we can work towards become more efficient at what we are doing. If we can get faster at our daily tasks, we will ultimately have more free time, which equals more time to do what we want to do. Technology has helped to make us more effective, if we take a little time to learn how to use it properly. Another thing we can do to free up time is to cut tasks out that we don't have to do, or even better, don't love to do. Perhaps there is someone else at work or at home who is perfectly capable of doing some of these tasks. If we really look at our list of things to do, we will certainly find redundancies or at least things we can pass off to others.

Remember, we all seem to find at least some time to do the things we really want to do. It seems we only complain about not having enough hours in a day, when we are talking about the things we are not so crazy about doing. So maybe the real solution is to fill our lives with things we love to do. Just some food for thought.

Get out of your comfort zone

I will be arriving back in Calgary tomorrow after one of my fitness week getaways. I try to take at least two weeks a year to focus completely on my health, physical and emotional! I find that when I go to these fitness camps, I come back with a clear head, am more patient with people and situations, and stand a little straighter and stronger. I could choose a nice hot vacation on a beach somewhere, but I choose to push myself physically, climbing up mountains, taking workout classes, stretching, eating organic healthy food, and then collapsing into bed around nine pm. No salt, no flour, no sugar, and no booze for a whole week, and yes it is possible.

In a lot of ways, this type of camp is similar to the type of work I choose to do in my career. My job pushes me to my utmost limits every day, and no two days are ever the same. I wonder if other people’s holidays are similar or completely different from the type of work they choose to do? If your work is physical, do you choose to take physical holidays? If your work is creative, do you choose thought provoking and interesting destination travel? Does anyone even think about what types of holidays they choose? Or, are we all so exhausted and stressed out by the time we take a vacation that it almost doesn’t count? Some people just stay home and paint the fence. Maybe it’s because they just can’t afford an actual holiday, or because that’s what helps them relax and clear their heads, but maybe it’s because they don’t know that there is a whole world of possibilities out there awaiting them.

At my staffing agency, I meet all kinds of people from all levels of ability, and what I find that holds people back the most in their careers is the same thing that holds people back from climbing mountains, the willingness to try.

We all enter the world with such innocence, but as a child grows, potential grows. Children push their boundaries, physically and psychologically. Socially they develop personalities that hopefully help them to become productive and responsible adults. As we get into adulthood, many of us choose jobs or careers that fit our comfort zone, and soon we are no longer pushing ourselves up that mountain. It is scary to try something new, especially if you know going in that it is going to be difficult. But no pain, no gain, right? That saying is true in some ways, whether building muscle and stamina, or when starting a new job.

Once you make the decision to try, it is so inspiring and builds such confidence. I have to say that I do love the luxurious, relaxing vacation sometimes too, but for me, there is nothing more uplifting and long lasting than a physical challenge and knowing once done that anything is possible.

Wants versus needs

I know that the time has come to write a column about wants and needs, when half of the conversations I am having with candidates, clients, and associates are about just that. So often what people want is what they think they need.

November 11th is Remembrance Day, a time to think about those who have given up so much for the benefit of others and the future of our nation. Although the day is a holiday and everyone is supposed to think about what we need for ourselves and our families, and what has been given up so we can be free, we often confuse the wants for needs.

And with Christmas season quickly approaching, we are already being bombarded with commercials, wish lists, and shiny objects dancing in our heads. It sure is easy to forget that we really do not need any of these things.

People panic about what they think they need for the future, the amount of money they need to have, the luxury car they need to drive, the enormous home they need to live in, the exotic vacations they need to take, and even that 10 thousand dollar watch they need to wear.

Most of what we think we need is not realistically a need; we live by wants. I spend my days hearing over and over again what candidates are looking for in jobs, what salary, where in the city, what industry, what environment, what growth opportunities, and what benefits they require. Rarely will I hear someone say that they just need a job to pay the bills!

If we look at what this week stands for and evaluate what is truly needed, we will realize that what we really need is to feel valued, be loved, eat well, wear warm clothing and dry socks, and have somewhere to call home. Our soldiers are sometimes forgotten, working for us so far away, and I am sure they are not yearning for shiny things. They work for our freedoms, they know the difference between wants and needs, and I bet they appreciate the small things.

I remember an argument I had with a colleague some years ago about choices. He insisted that everything we do and say is a choice. I disagreed, as I believed there were some things we had to do and we had no choice but to do them. I realize now that he was right. Everything is a choice, including what we do for a living, where we live, what we do, and the relationships we cherish. Remember this week, those who choose or have chosen to fight for our free nation, and have given up so many of the wants we take for granted.